cut, switch, bait

If you know my blogging style, you know I am truly George Costanza, forever trying to keep my world's from colliding. When we first moved to L.A, I wanted everything to be in one place, and I linked my real name here. Big. Mistake. It has become the first hit on google when I google my name and that is not what I want.

I also haven't wanted to pay for my blog for awhile now and have been like a deer in the headlights trying to make a decision where to go, what to link, etc. That has all been solved and you will find me here:

(www dot intheviolethour dot com) 

Annoying I know, that I'm not hyperlinking, but again with the whole world collision thing. I do hope you'll join me there, with new posts and old familiar things, (like my projects and lists), as I get things up and running. I'll continue to keep violethour.squarespace.com live until things are moved. (oh how I wish Squarespace imported easily into other platforms, or that it was easy to make a book from. Sigh.)

xo!!

list no. 18 :: observations related to no. 43 on my list

It was a big weekend for me, an embarrassment of riches really, being able to cross no. 43 off my list. Two group shows in forty-eight hours and it was a bit overwhelming and exhilerating and I am beyond thrilled and proud of myself.

I learned a lot this past week and here are some of my observations: 

1. I over-framed my work for one of the shows. 
2. For the other, ( because it was short notice), I framed my photos quickly and with a lot less fanfare than the show mentioned above. 
3. And I fretted that the quick job would make me seem like an amateur.
4. The truth is, the down and dirty framing looked just as good.
5. And I think most photographers know this, (or at least the photographers in these two shows seemed to know it). 
6. There's a huge schmooz factor when it comes to gallery shows. 
7. Most of the artists stood around and often right in front of their work for the evening.
8. I'm uncomfortable standing around my work.
9.  Because I stand nearby like an observer, no one knew I was the artist.
10. As a lurker, I found myself privy to comments, good and bad.
11. I think it was a good experience for me to hear positive and negative remarks. 
12. It was a lesson in patience and understanding and letting go. 
13. I think I get too attached to my work.
14. I learned how to hang my art in a gallery.
15. And I hung another person's work, affording me the opportunity to experience every possibility of how to hang, especially when you've run out of hanging brackets. 
16. I'm so tired today! 
17. But I'm also happy and whole.

lately

There are days I feel like a shadow of myself; clearly marked boundaries of before and after. I notice a detached, third person sort of way of identifying myself in my thoughts, in a Chris Keller sort of way. 

My new operating system isn't so new anymore, although to be fair to myself, I don't think I really understood its mechanics until recently. Not in any sort of enlightened way, more like,

I've learned that trying to control anything is really an effort in futility...

and in my mind, that's something, because I've been fighting that notion for a long time. 

Lately I notice that my sister's passing isn't a kick in my gut. It's not the first thing I blurt out to assuage what may come from my mouth; I've learned to control my impulses and to filter my tongue once again. There's a deeper sadness, a longing for what is no longer. There are happy memories too, the visual memories that assaulted me in the wee hours of the morning have dissipated and I've learned how to get on without her in my world. I hate that it was sink or swim, but that's the only option. You accept what is, or you can't go on. That choice is the last bit of control you can garner and it was my sounding board to accepting that this life is beautiful and fucked up and that I can only do the best that I can every day. That's the gift, that ability to wake up and start fresh again. 

list no. 17 :: the music

An embarrassment of riches, truly one for the ages, here is a list of the music we heard at Coachella*.

 Friday

1. Abe Vigoda
2. James (Good old tunes to dance to!)
3. Jimmy Cliff 
4. Girls
5. Gary Clark Jr (We only heard snippets but really good)
6. Arctic Monkeys
7. Madness 
8. M. Ward
9. Pulp**
10. The Rapture (Only one song, but the one song you want to hear and we jumped right in singing and dancing.)
11. The Black Keys** (RAD!! I'd heard them on the radio and I didn't really care, but lordy was I wrong. Those boys play wicked guitar and the tunes are soul-filled. I'd definitely love to see them again.)
12. Swedish House Mafia** (I heard their entire set from our tent, while I was sleeping...or in and out of sleep because I had ear plugs. I kept wondering why the camp site next to ours had the music so loud. I could feel the base in the ground under my sleeping bag. I remember liking the music, just wishing they'd turn it down.)

Saturday 

1. AWOLnation (Fast, sort of pop sound with a band full of head bangers.)
2. Kaiser Chiefs (SO. FUN.)
3. Andrew Bird (Ohai, amazing)
4. Laura Marling (Again, amazing)
5. Manchester Orchestra
6. Squeeze (awww)
7. Buzzcocks
8. Firehose
9. St. Vincent (Didn't love as much as I wanted to)
10. The Shins** (Oh my. I didn't get it about The Shins but now I do. They won my heart and were definitely a top favorite of the entire weekend.)
11. Bon Iver. (Bon Nuit. I love his music so so much and have all of his CD's and play them regularly. But his show was boring and it was freezing and it made me sleepy.)
12. Radiohead (This was my 4th time I've seen them and probably my least favorite. Still my favorite band but...)

Sunday

1. Fanfarlo (Fantastic!)
2. Lissie (Bluesy, folksy, rockin' tunes from a girl with a beautiful voice. Definitely looking for more of her music.)
3. Band of Skulls
4. Santigold
5. Real Estate (moody and lovely and in a tent that was in the shade, so perfect.)
6. Wild Flag (Super rock all girl punk band. LOVE. 2/3 of sleator-kinney and the one lead guitar girl is on the show Portlandia. Def worth checking them out.)
7. The Hives
8. Gotye
9. Beirut (Love, love, love, we saw most of their set)
10. Justice (Super dance party!)
11. Florence and the Machine (I don't know what happened, or maybe she was always Oh Mighty Isis and I didn't know it.)
12. Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg** (My favorite. They had a live band, none of that taped crap and they brought down the house. Insane.)

*We heard 2-4 songs, depending on timing. Because so much of the music was happening simultaneously, we were strategic on how we'd get the most out of the bands we wanted to see.

**These were the acts that we had to see, (either or both of us), and we made it a point to hear the entire set.

that was a good day

Because I let Coachella because coachella took a lot out of me take all precedence around here this week, I didn't get a chance to talk about my new ink, also (not so coincidentally), on my list and now over two weeks old.

Hummingbirds started appearing in my life with frequency about a year ago. We took note of them on our road trip up and down California last year, and one hovered and danced before our eyes in Venice Beach. Since then my little friends fly in and about my world on a regular basis, doing the most incredible things in my presence. I believe they're my spirit animal, and I've felt a very strong affinity to having a hummingbird tattooed onto my now almost finished hip-holster, in place previously planned with cluster of roses, the NY state flower.

I was certain of the artist I wanted and I bashfully admit that I waited almost two years to get an appointment with him. I think he must have had a cancellation because I got a random email six days before the appointment asking if I was available. I wasn't, but I made certain that I worked it out that I could be.

The wait was worth it. I only wish I didn't have to twist and contort to see my hummingbird or take a photo, (which is why you don't see one here yet). My hummingbird is a male, I don't know why but it is so. He looks like he's in flight. There's incredible detail on his face and the slight hint of pink around his eye is amazing. His feathers and the hint of white upon his wings. 

Of course I'm in love.